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ARTICLES I WROTE

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  • REVIEW: COMING OUT PARTY
    coming out party finally hits australia. although they didn't think i am that funny. this, from the country whose biggest comedic achievement is crocodile dundee. screw them!
  • HOOKING UP...
    "hooking up in the real world," hosted by coral and myself. it ended up pretty good.
  • COMING OUT PARTY
    "coming out" stories told by comedians and writers. not a comedy show, per se, but is often funny.

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    Comments

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    Shannon

    AMEN to that Brother Dan!!!!! I could not agree more on all points!! It's time for Tom and Katie and their alien non-existent (I still think that bump changes daily and looks a little odd, besides has she not been preggers for like 10 years now?) baby to go far far away..........FOREVER!!

    Brooke

    Dan..your the best!

    Patrick

    So right there with you, brother. I missed the Diane Sawyer interview, but frankly I probably would have skipped it had I known about it because he scared me a while ago. I think even before the couch-jumping, which at first charmed me (being something of a jumper my own self), then it started to look more and more staged, or self-conscious, or SOMETHING. I've been saying for years that I think he's a cyborg. I don't know why, but I do.

    Jess

    I'm not a fan of his. In addition to his general zaniness, he's amazingly arrogant. He belittles the opinions of others and speaks like he's a great authority when he's just an actor--and not a very good one. The sad thing is that we'll continue to endure this crap, because the media love this stuff. The bigger the train wreck, the more viewers eat it up... and that's what the Diane Sawyers of this world care about!

    Kim

    I think someone should call child protective services on them as soon as the baby is born. He's just not sane. And people get their kids taken away for less.
    At least all of this will result in a great tell-all book when his children are old enough to write it.

    The Aitch

    From your lips to his ears.

    Ed

    Dan don't u mean "primetime" not "dateline"?

    Deb_LA

    Um, yeah. I have already decided I will never pay to see a Tom Cruise movie again. Not even on demand. Damn, that man has lost his mind. Really. I fear for his children more than Brit and Kevin's.

    Jane

    Tommy is trying to make up for the fact that he has a small penis!

    Dan

    Why is it, that after a certain level of fame, all stars seem to go insane? I'm chalking it up to boredom and lack of reality.

    Then again, Tom Cruise really scares the hell out of me. He strikes me as the type of guy to go all "Sleeping with the Enemy" on Katie after she gives birth to Lil' L. Ron. Then again, this is the guy who played nuts in Taps, almost too perfect.

    I agree Dan, we need to stop rewarding these celebs with our cash. No MI:3 for me either.

    misscrankypants

    I often watch these interviews with my roommate and find myself asking her, "I am dying to know what it was that broke Tom Cruise. He was so normal in the 80s."

    Now he's an arrogant, smug, overpaid asshole and that is a shame.

    I fear him.

    Papa Razzi

    Right on Dan...I agree with you. Except you should change "dateline" to "primetime" and "thing" to "think". I'm just a little nit-picky because when you're going off on THE Tom Cruise, you don't want to give him or his defenders any reason to call you stupid or say you don't know what you're talking about.

    But anyways...here is my take on the interview, if anyone's interested:

    http://rag-n-bag.livejournal.com/36690.html

    Lynnster, yeah

    Yep, you totally read my mind. I adored Tom Cruise from the time I was 17 and Risky Business was first-run at the theater. Starting with the Oprah appearance and everything since has totally turned me off to him for good and, like you, I'm not sure I can bear to even watch him in a movie anymore. Tom, you totally screwed up and shoulda quit while you were still (barely) ahead...

    Stephanie

    How did Diane stop herself from laughing?? I fear for Katie Holmes, like, 5 minutes ago she seemed like a perfectly normal adult. Now she just seems brainwashed.

    BY LOVE!

    Also, Tom's role in Magnolia has a whole new meaning.

    Ryan

    As much as I can't stand that man, I also tuned in for the interview. Every time he maniacally laughs after responding to a question I want to put my fist thru the tv.

    I love how he can never answer anything about Scientology directly. When Diane asked him about it and he responded with "read a book" and she retorted with "i've read two," all he could come up with was to refer her to some other book which she's of course never heard of. He's fucking clueless.

    I've been on a boycott of all of his stuff for a while now, and it has changed my life for the better. I feel so free, and you will too.

    Erica

    I do a little happy dance that Nicole won an Oscar, and he hasn't done it.... YAY!!!

    I'm going to say something really, really snarky now in re: his "read a book" answer.... how would he know? He's dyslexic! I think he got something twisted, or only read the Cliff Notes!

    Bon

    Best. Post. Ever.

    thibault

    wow! i thaught Tom was the favorit american actor all around the US.
    I can tell that's the same thing in France.

    Todd Sivard

    Ugh, now he reveals to GQ mag that he plans to eat her placenta. http://news.xinhuanet.com/english/2006-04/18/content_4444133.htm

    Michael

    I'm still going to try and ignore him and go see MI:III.

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