"Thank you for calling 7-Eleven. My name is Mario. How may I be of service?"
Hi. I would like the ingredients for your Pumpkin Spice Latte.
"Pumpkin Spice Latte?"
"Is this a product 7-Eleven carries?"
"Thank you sir."
Am I your first caller about the Pumpkin Spice Latte? It is the most important product 7-Eleven carries. It is my reason for living. You guys sell it from a machine in all the stores.
(typing sounds heard in the background) "Okay sir, I will check the 7-Eleven web site for information."
I already did that, but I couldn't find a page that lists the ingredients in the drink.
"Thank you." (long pause) "I am also checking Google to see if I can find any information."
Well yeah, obviously I did that too. I don't think it's there.
(speaks in slightly condescending tone) "Well, sir, actually I already found the information."
You did? Where?
"I have a page with directions of how you can make your own pumpkin spice latte."
Ah. I don't need that. I need the ingredients for what is sold in the store.
"I can send you this information if you like."
But I am not making a pumpkin spice latte at home. I need to know the nutritional information and the specific ingredients of the drink sold in the store. It's required by law that you have to provide it. I realize you probably don't have it, since you don't know what a Pumpkin Spice Latte is, but this information is at 7-Eleven somewhere.
"I see sir."
It's too delicious to be just normal coffee. I want to know what special ingredients are in it.
"I can create a request for information for you, sir."
Do you really know what this drink is?
"No I do not sir."
It is seriously the best thing to happen to America. But I'm worried that I'm drinking a cup full of chemicals.
"This web page lists the ingredients, sir--"
It can't be the exact same as what you sell in your store! Your food comes in a box and sits on hot rollers all day without going bad. There is obviously something special in the Pumpkin Spice Latte.
"Would you like me to create a request for you sir?"
"Please tell me, where would you buy this product?"
Never mind. (click)