How was your day, Dan?

THEATRE CLUB: 'THE ADDAMS FAMILY'

Let's discuss "The Addams Family," specifically the musical version currently touring around the U.S.  It's probaby coming soon to a town near you.  There is also a production on Broadway but it is currently starring Brooke Shields as Morticia and that is so ridiculous I can't even get into it.

- The show is fun.  Some of the audience tonight gave it a standing ovation; I wouldn't go that far, but was it worth the ticket? Yes.

- The plot is not based on the TV show characters; it goes back further and pulls from the original "Addams Family" cartoons from The New Yorker, which of course no one today has ever seen.  But even with that bit of structure, the plot has only one very thin thread: Wednesday, who is now a teenager, has fallen in love with a boy from Ohio and Gomez/Morticia are freaked out.  And Uncle Fester falls in love with the moon, which was a sub-plot that I still don't understand?...but it was only 2 songs so it's no big deal.

- But I do think the musical works best if you have seen the TV show, or the movies, or something to put it all in context: this family lives in their own world, where death and disease are events to celebrate, and they find a romantic thrill in all moments of despair.  In the musical, there is very little of that morbid humor; a few jokes pop up, but most of the dialogue could be from any musical anywhere.  Why is Wednesday singing so many songs about love?  When did she become so optimistic? 

- Almost-absent plot aside, the reason to see this show are the characters, most notably Douglas Sills as Gomez.  Every word out of his mouth is twisted to somehow be funny, and he's so energetic as he wiggles around the stage and chases Morticia, it's impossible to not have fun watching him.  When actors don't have a lot to work with, they have to create laughs on their own, so he does.

-Act 1 is much more entertaining than Act 2, although it should also be said the first half is longer.  The second half is weighed down by several mushy ballads, they are just boring.   Then there are two dance productions featuring Morticia as the lead dancer, which could be fun; but the actress, Sara Gettelfinger, moves through all the steps about one-half beat behind the music, she is obviously not much of a dancer.  But dressed up as Morticia she is so gorgeous it doesn't matter. And she can sing.  This is, after all, a musical, so it's nice to hear pleasant singing.

- Like I said, there is very little dark humor; there is none of the morbid creepiness played (brilliantly!) by Christina Ricci in the films.  Here, Wednesday is just a girl singing upbeat songs about love.  Gomez is just singing about loving Morticia.  Uncle Fester is really funny, even when he's singing about loving the moon?...again, I had no idea what was going on there. If you see the show, you'll get what I mean. But the characters spend more time singing about love than they do talking about anything creepy.  So that was a let-down, but just a little

- There were a lot of families, and the kids seemed to enjoy it, but I think adults more appreciated the slapstick humor, just because adults remember how maudlin Gomez, Morticia, and Uncle Fester are supposed to be. Whatever, it's meant to be simple and it works out great, as long as there are good actors in the lead roles. If you're expecting plot, then why would you go to "The Addams Family" musical anyway?

WAITING

It's late at night, but I can't go to bed yet.  My blankets are still damp from the laundry.  I have a washer in my apartment, but not a dryer--the joys of living in the Art Deco district, sometimes apartments aren't outfitted with complete sets of modern conveniences--and with the Florida humidity, sometimes it takes a while for stuff to dry.  So here I sit. 

I haven't been out on a date in a while; it's been, um, months?  Months, several, I can't even count.  Whatever, I don't keep track of these things really, but a few days ago I realized it has in fact been a long time, so I decided to make an effort at being social and put myself out there.  It's difficult, being a returning college student surrounded by classmates who are literally—LITERALLY—half your age (that's not the difficult part) and look at you with sympathetic eyes beneath raised eyebrows as they try to give you a compliment by telling you "You look good for your age" or "You're not THAT old" (that was the difficult part, right there, isn't that fun?).  I'm surrounded by people who view me as somewhat of an oddity.  And there is also the fact that I actually am somewhat odd.  So no, none of these people are asking me out.  It was time to shake it off, shake all of it off, the working-full-time and the classes and the homework and the no-life-whatsoever that has consumed my little existence.

So I went to a party.  And I regret to inform you, dear reader, that I spent the entire evening talking to the 2 straight women there, both of whom left their husbands at home for the night to hang out with a bunch of gay guys.  It would probably be easier to find a date if I actually spoke to someone who was (a) not married and (b) of my preferred gender.  Although I did tell them of my perpetual singledom and tasked them with finding me a mate.  Thanks to Facebook, I have faith they will keep track of me and work on it.

Ah!  I just remembered the last time I was on a date.  It was in, um, April I think?...I bought a new shirt to wear.  I went out with that short guy, we went to dinner and it was nice, but then he freaked out because he needed to "protect himself" from the possibility that we would be rushing into a relationship too quickly.  Seriously, this was after one dinner.  It's just as confusing now remembering the experience as it was dealing with him when it happened.  And he wasn't making up a lame excuse to blow me off, he called me the next day to chat. He really was THAT SCARED of relationships. Weirdo.

My blankets better be dry.

 

 

AROUND THE WEBS

There is so much to see and read! Where to begin?

1) Republican nominees debate last night:  Did Rick Perry really refer to Herman Cain as "brother"?  Not good.  Mitt Romney handled himself really well, he was funny and at one point basically told Perry to shut up, which is normally not appropriate behavior but last night was well-deserved.  People make fun of Romney for being a bit of a wimp, but I think he's just sitting back and letting everyone else self-destruct. 

2) I somehow became obsessed with watching "Project Runway Australia" online. It is a much happier, sassier show than the American version, perhaps because Australians are just nicer people?...Season 3 of their show recently wrapped up, and I interviewed one of the finalists, Johnny Schembri, for the Project Runway blog.

 

 

IN THE NEWS: MLK, GAMBLING, PAN AM

Let's discuss stuff going on in the world around us, shall we?  Yes I think we shall.  If you aren't interested in legalized gambling, the 2nd one won't be interesting to you.

~~~

1) The MLK Memorial.  I am thrilled to see Dr. King's legacy being memorialized in Washington, D.C.  But I can't help but think his likeness looks like Han Solo when he was frozen in carbonite. You be the judge (click on the photos to enlarge):

...I'm just sayin'.

 

~~~

2) Gambling is coming to Miami.  Miami's economy is not the strongest, and with the success of the Seminole Indian casino that sits several miles west of anywhere you would ever want to go of the beach--raking in billions of dollars for the tribe, none of which goes to the Florida government--lawmakers around here have decided fully-legalized casinos are the answer to our monetary shortfalls.  So they are going to grant, like, three gambling licenses to huge casino operators to build mega-resorts, probably in downtown Miami (which is close enough to the beach to be tourist-relevant).  The argument is that the casinos will bring in money to help the state budget (there is no income tax in Florida, FYI) and create jobs.

Here's the deal: The "Occupy Wall Street" protestors down here in Florida should be going insane with this proposal.  With the 3 casinos opening, the government is requiring the companies that run them to have at least $2 billion (yes, billion) in assets for the projects.  So this means it will be investors coming in, not anyone local.   So right there that means the high-paying executive jobs are going to be people who aren't from here.  Hello, "1%."

Casinos, like anything in the hospitality/tourism industry, have mostly low-wage service jobs. Other than a few select dealers who make big paychecks based on tips (which are pooled by shift), these people are not pulling in big salaries.  So all these jobs they are creating aren't that great.  Unless you are a director of a hotel, your salary is pretty low compared to having a similar-scale management job in another industry.  Ever been to The Bahamas?  Jamaica?  Yeah, tourism isn't the greatest way of making a strong economy.

Miami is the least educated city in America. (Click that link and scroll to the bottom of the list.)  So businesses with decent jobs do NOT want to operate here; they will have problems finding capable employees, and the companies that are here are likely to hire staffing agencies to recruit people from out-of-town to move here.  Getting not-so-great-paying jobs at a casino is just going to reinforce this cycle, keeping people from needing any sort of education.

I think they should be legalized; but let's not fool anyone in saying they are going to be good for the city. It's not going to do much of anything, really...everything will stay the same. A few people will get rich, the end.

~~~

3) "Pan Am," the best show on TV, is doing terribly.  Generally if a major-network has ratings below a 2 (percent of the market share), it's dunzo.  "Pan Am" has fallen to 1.8.  HOW IS THIS POSSIBLE? Am I the only one watching this show?  I realize I am not a reliable resource for knowing what is palatable to the masses--"Showgirls" is my favorite movie, I have no idea who Demi Lovato is, etc.--but "Pan Am" to me is a well-written, fun show, with the cast whooshing around the world for drama and excitement.  Maybe its time slot is tough, competing with Sunday football and other big dramas on TV?  Le sigh.  Someone who is currently a Nielsen rater: please, start watching this show, so it stays on the air for me.

WHAT IS THIS THING

I have a plant growing in my yard but I don't know what it is.

 

I like it. But Florida has a huge problem with invasive "exotic" plants imported from various tropical locales, which then take over land and kill the native stuff that actually feeds local animals.  So I don't want to keep this thing around if it's something evil.

 

Close-up of the leaves.  Ideas, anyone?

CONVERSATION WITH MOM

(ring)

Hello?

"Hi Danny!"

Hello.

"Hello?"

Hello...

"Hello?"

Yes, hello...

"Can you hear me?"

Yes I can hear you.

"Oh I couldn't tell, I thought you were saying 'hello' like 'HELLO?'"

Then I would've said "Hell-OOO?" not "Hello."

"Ok, so can you hear me now?"

(pause)

No.

"Really?"

I'm kidding.  If I couldn't hear you, how could I have answered the question?

"You're very funny."

What did people talk about before the invention of cell phones, when people could call each other and have entire conversations about whether or not they can hear each other?

"I don't know. I don't even remember what I called you now."