CONVERSATIONS WITH MOM

(ring)

"Hello?"

Hi Mom, I saw you called.

"Hi Danny!"

How is your vacation?

"Fabulous. But can I call you back?"

Sure.  What are you doing?

"I'm on my way to the spa for my pedicure."

That is fabulous.

"Whatcha doin'?"

Driving to work. 

"Which job?"

My regular one.  My waiter job is only a few evenings each week.

"How's it going?"

It's fine. I--

"Oh wait, I need to call you back. I'm getting into the elevator."

Okay, just call me later.

"Were you able to memorize the menu?"

The menu, yes, but I still don't know the wine list.

"Are you making lots of money?"

Millions.  I'll be able to afford putting you in the nicest retirement village.

"Tell them to give you the best sections so you can make lots of money and buy a house and then your mother can come visit."

When I stop making mistakes, I'll try.

"Are you going to buy a house with a lanai, like on 'The Golden Girls'?"

That's my plan, yes.

"Okay, I gotta call you back, I'm walking into the spa."

Okay, call me later.

"Do you think you're going to like working there?"

Mom, if you're going to the spa, just call me later.

"Well fine, I was just asking you a question, but if you don't want to talk to your mother..."

 

Comments

[Glenn D]

Dan, your mom is just as cool as you are! Your conversations with mom are always hysterical.

[blackbird]

You can't win you know.
Just sayin.

[Lorena]

I love the conversations with your mom! So funny!

[B.Good]

Oh.My.God. That is the exact conversation I have with my mother.

Sometimes our convo ends with her saying goodbye, me saying goodbye, and then me hanging up in her face as she begins to talk about something else. Oops...silly me, I thought we were finished. I guess the "goodbye" threw me off.

[Jen]

You know this could be a sitcom right? It could replace Will and Grace quite easily. I think you would have an amazing following, just an idea!!!

[Leandro]

i wonder if she ever reads these... =)