Let's discuss the Emmys. I'm watching it right now. (updating as I go)
First of all, Kim Kardashian and Cher are becoming the same person. They have had so much plastic surgery, they exchange facial parts, snapping them on and off like a Potato Head doll. This is why they are never seen in the same place together. Did Kim Kardashian learn nothing from Bruce Jenner's hideous face lift? Plastic surgery is not the way to go. Especially when you're still in your 30's.
That's off my chest now, I feel better.
--News from the red carpet: Javier Bardem is going to appear on an episode of Glee, playing Sue Sylvester's ex-boyfriend. Let me tell you how much fun that sentence was to type. I wish all blog posts were filled with good news like that. I have such an inexplicable desire for Javier Bardem, I might actually see "Eat Pray Love" and sit through the whole thing, just to see his scenes at the end. Although I am working up to committing to that experience, it will take lots of willpower.
--Neil Patrick Harris needs to stop wearing the taupe-gray tuxedos.
--Julia Louis Dreyfus needs to hire a stylist, and stop getting her dresses at the mall.
--Giuliana Rancic quote: "You'll never believe this--but Susan Sarandon LOVES ping pong." Seriously. Said, on television.
(let's move to the awards. shall we?)
--Eric Stonestreet deserves this win. Sorry, Neil Patrick Harris, you're the favorite but seriously...Stonestreet is genius. If Jane Lynch doesn't win, however, it negates the entire show.
--Okay, Jane wins, that's good. Her speech, however, is not.
--Ryan Murphy just won for Best Director (Glee); as he stood, he kissed his beau. So far, this entire show has been one big same-sex kiss after another.
--Congratulations to Jim Parsons for winning Best Actor in a Comedy, The Big Bang Theory, a show most of America has seen while watching in-flight TV.
--Seriously, how many Oprah promos are there going to be in this Emmys broadcast? She's not even closing her show, she's just moving to her own network. It's like Cher giving seventeen "farewell" tours. Oh cool, I've mentioned Cher twice in one post.
(this blog post will pause during the awards for drama series--what is plural for "series"? serieses?--because I don't watch any of these shows except for "Mad Men." We'll see if they win any big ones.)
--Wait—they're cutting of people's acceptance speeches so Jimmy Fallon can sing songs dressed up like Elton John? Changing. The. Channel.
--George Clooney just won the Humanitarian award, for all his telethons to raise money for disasters. And he mentioned how he is 49 years old. If that's what 49 looks like, I cannot wait to get there. Or maybe I would just like to meet his version up close and very personal.
--Let's take a break to discuss the worst gowns, shall we? I already mentioned Julia Louis Dreyfus; January Jones looks like she was dressed by a Project Runway contestant; Anna Paquin looks like she is is ready to go into battle, that dress is the WORST.
--Back to the awards. I haven't seen any of the other nominees for Best Actress in a TV movie; but I can't believe any of them were as good as Claire Danes was in "Temple Grandin." Flawless.