It's almost 3 AM. I just got home.

I love writing now, with all the lights off and the whir of the fridge humming away the evils of going to bed alone. That sounds pathetic. It's not meant to be, I'm just fine. In fact, tonight I consciously chose to sleep alone, for no other reason than I'm tired. But not too tired to write to you, dearest blogettes.

~~~

I've gone out a few times with a certain gentleman.

Very mega super good-looking, funny, smart. A little older than me, just right. When we're out doing the things we do, he converses with me, doesn't just talk at me as most men communicate.

Sounds great, right?

I have come to the opinion that he has a wife.

As in, not a gay lover he jokingly refers to by a female-spousal label. As in, a real wife.

Why do I think this? I have my reasons. I'll get into it later.

But how unfortunate if this is, in fact, not true, yet I go on thinking it anyway. It will bring a rapid end to our (as of yet barely-existent, but definitely potential-filled) relationship situation--mainly because I would apply accelerated force to his testicles and remove them from his body, before sending him home to explain to his wife where his balls went.

World AIDS Day was yesterday. Have we learned nothing? There will be no sexing around with people before going home to your wife, please. How gauche.

I am going to ask him the next time I see him.

I'm sure he'll say no.

But the Cancerians...we are a perceptive bunch. I see you. Will the denial be the truth, or a lie?

Hmm.

Comments

[johnO]

Maybe you should try steering the conversation in such a way that you end up joking about married men. You could even purr: "ooohh, I love married men, so forbidden" I know it's maybe not so nice entrapping, but if he is married, I think it's clear to you that he's really not so nice either. In any event see how he reacts. I personally do like married men (they're easy and they always come over with 'full' intent). But I don't like how some seem to think they are James Bond with their double lives. The fact that they might be pathetic and that doing what they do makes them total assholes to the people they supposedly love doesn't even cross their minds. And when I find out they are married, it sort of bums me out too (though not enough apparently). I know I know, morals of an alley cat. But damn, some married guys are sooooo hot! And if I were married, even unhappily to a woman, I would make moves to not deceive everyone when it became clear to me that I am and will be deceiving for the rest of my life.

[Erica aka GroovyYaYa]

Have you checked the ring finger for tell-tale signs of a ring that has been removed? Also, have you googled him? When you call him, are you only getting his cell phone? Have you looked him up on the phone book online to see if his wife is also listed under that number?

Ultimately, there is always that ussearch.com (I think that is the website). That is how a friend of mine found out stuff about a guy she was seeing... it is an older friend, and she had the biggest shithead for an ex that you have ever heard of...

[Liz]

Your gut is telling you something so listen. When you see 1 cock roach that usually means there 10,000. I'm referring to the amount of lies this guy probably tells. You know something is up and you can bet Mr. Charming has played this game before. You're a class act Dan, love you. XOXO

[jords]

ahhh to be gay again......

[Suzi]

Ouch - no matter if you're gay or straight - stay away - stay FAR AWAY from a married guy! They bring you nothing but misery and pain! They may make you feel wonderful one moment and then like absolute lower than low the next. Not that I have any experience (I'm just sayin...) ;)
Seriously, no matter how hot he is, or how great you feel when you're with him, don't do it! Don't get sucked in deeper into his world. You are an amazing guy and will find someone 10,000 times better, hotter and NOT MARRIED!! xoxo & good luck to ya!!

[blackbird]

did we both know that we are both cancerian?
have I had some wine?

I think YES.

[Glenn C.]

Dan, you said you were looking to get married and honeymoon in Iceland. The key words here are "find a guy to marry" not "find a guy who is already married". You're on the right track but it looks like you put the cart before the horse. Good luck! Did I mention I have a great butt and I'm a good listener? ;P

[matthew]

married guys are always trouble! stay away, very far away!

[Cody]

I have a quote I hold dear to my heart.

"I never mess with married men. They give all the good presents to their wives out of shame."

Blanche from Golden Girls

Remember that Dan, remember....

[Tina]

I'm with GroovyYaYa. Every guy I have met I have looked him up somehow. I usually only do the free things first. I look up the county voters regisration website & the county clerk marriage records. There you can see if he is married & who lives with him (assuming they are a registered voter) I think all states/counties have it. Do you feel comfortable looking someone up? I think the first guy I meet that I don't feel the need to look up will be the one. I guess I just have major trust issues. Oh and if you find out he is married you can casually use his wife's name in a conversation & just watch the panic on his face.

[Marc]

Yeah, if you feel something's not right, chances are you're probably onto something. Usually when we have to answer the question, we already know the answer. You can do better, Dan.

[Erica aka GroovyYaYa]

Tina - OMG... I never thought of voter registration and other county records. I admit... I just google people I meet, co-workers, etc. I don't pay for the ussearch.com, but I have used it to confirm someone's age.

[willam]

unless he's gifting like Santa or hung like a moose, i'd git. but that's just me. Wifey aint doing her deeds? Why not fill in? You don't know her. When all else fails WWMJBD?
No mo' Drama in the hateration Dan.